


Charades

by ExhumingR



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Enjolras just keeps putting his foot in it, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-11
Updated: 2015-05-07
Packaged: 2018-03-07 05:17:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3162653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExhumingR/pseuds/ExhumingR
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When on the phone with your hideously rich and eccentric aunt who is attempting to set you up with “a darling young chap”, do at least try to hold your tongue. Just politely remind her that you’re not interested, be the bigger person. It may be the fifth time in the past fortnight that she’s tried to set you up with “Hugo, you know the dear boy, his family owns that charming house in France” but she is your aunt and she’s just trying to help. Do not attempt to lie.<br/>Apparently, Enjolras missed that last memo...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Open mouth, insert foot.

When on the phone with your hideously rich and eccentric aunt who is attempting to set you up with “a darling young chap”, do at least try to hold your tongue. Just politely remind her that you’re not interested, be the bigger person. It may be the fifth time in the past fortnight that she’s tried to set you up with “Hugo, you know the dear boy, his family owns that charming house in France” but she is your aunt and she’s just trying to help. Do _not_ attempt to lie.

Apparently, Enjolras missed that last memo. It was unusual behaviour for him to lie to get out of situations but his aunt would not take no for an answer. After so many failed dates he was sick of the meddling and so decided to royally stick his foot it in. "Aunty, I have a boyfriend already," he sighed, hoping his feigned nonchalance would hide his fib. In his mind it seemed like the perfect thing to say. His aunt would stop setting him up on dates with men he couldn't stand and he didn't have to upset his aunt by telling her he didn't want her help with his love life. Everyone's a winner! Or not...

"Oh sweetie, darling, why didn't you tell me sooner? I'll have to meet him immediately, make sure he isn't some young hooligan out to corrupt my special little boy," his aunt crooned.

"I'm twenty four, I can look after myself."

"Oh I know dear but one must always seek confirmation from one's family before committing oneself to a relationship." Of course she'd think that, as lovely a woman as she was -really she was the only family Enjolras actually liked- her ideas were quite old-fashioned. Honestly, Enjolras sometimes wondered why he put up with it yet always he was reminded when he thought of how distant he was with his parents. There ought to at least be _some_ family he could still keep in contact with and his aunt was the best he had.

"You'd like him, really, aunty. There's no need to get excited though, we haven't been dating long."

"Nonsense, darling, if you're courting him he's obviously special. Two weeks, two weeks and I'll come visit you, darling,you know it makes sense!"

"But-"

"Must dash, your uncle's gotten himself stuck up that blasted ladder again."

"Wait! Aunty-"

"Kisses, darling!" The line ran flat and he was left with his mouth open, staring at his phone. Damn.


	2. Mating Dance

 Presently, Enjolras was considering two options. One: move country and change his number. Two: become a monk and never have to worry about dating again. Having officially stuck his foot in it, he decided that now would probably be the best time to consult the expert before he dug himself a deeper hole. In times like this there really was only one person he trusted to talk him out of stupid decisions.

 Unfortunately, Combeferre was otherwise occupied at that moment in time so he sought out Courfeyrac which was actually an idea he'd come to strongly regret. That wasn't to say he didn't trust Courfeyrac's judgement, on the contrary, he valued the centre's input as much as his guide's but the former was prone to making more rash decisions and ultimately thought it was about time that Enjolras got back on his horse and started 'playing the field'. 

"So, you want to get a boy, huh?" Courfeyrac drawled, eyes already gleaming with bright ideas.

"-No-"

"This is excellent, my baby is growing up so fast and I am so proud you came to me for man advice! Of course this will be no walk in the park, you've let yourself get all scruffy, look you've got syrup on your shirt," Courfeyrac babbled.

 It was at this point that Joly looked over from the next table where he was studying and waved his hand frantically. "If you're talking about making yourself attractive to potential partners I watched the /coolest/ documentary about that!" Courfeyrac grinned in response to the med student.

"Now we've got an expert, this is perfect. Come on then Joly, show us what you've got!" With a loud groan, Enjolras put his head in his hands, there'd be no stopping them now.

"-well, first you gotta entice them, fluff up your feathers, give 'em the ol' razzle dazzle," Joly began, puffing up his chest and arching his arms like wings, "Like this, stand tall -come on!" The leader found himself being tugged out of his seat by the slender man who really had no right to be that strong. "Okay, stand tall, shoulders back. Now, just kind of... shimmy." Enjolras shimmied, well, shimmy/shuffled at least while the other two watched critically. "Ok," Joly aquisised, "so maybe it works better when you actually have feathers." It dawned on Enjolras that maybe he needed new friends, ones that didn't think bird feather displays a were legitimate way to impress a man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that this is so short again but I totally forgot I even started this fic. So here's a brief chapter to get the ball rolling. (And give me a chance to actually figure out a decent plot.)

**Author's Note:**

> Another fake boyfriend au. This has been stewing in my head for a good eight months now but I'm still not entirely sure which way it'll go. Sorry for the incredibly short chapter. Just trying to put at least something out here so I'll be motivated to work on it some more. Hope you all enjoy!
> 
> Edit 3/2/15  
> Ok, I have two story lines written, just deciding which to go with and then I'll get to work putting the next chapter. Bear with me!


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